This year's pothole season is turning out to be one of the worst in memory. Frequent freeze-thaw weather – warm temperatures, water, heavy traffic followed by a deep freeze – has created the ideal conditions for a proliferation of car-wrecking craters.
Once the cars start rolling, the vibrations cause asphalt to crumble. Road crews are working hard across the country, but there is only so much they can do.
That's why I am turning to the power of poetry to alleviate my suffering and articulate the workings of my inner soul.
And so, I present Pot and Holes, a collection of my most moving poetry that gives voice to the automotive angst that arises each year at this time (with apologies to bestselling poet Rupi Kaur).
This is the journey of surviving. This is the blood, sweat and road rage of 51 years.
The bumping. The breaking. The exorbitant repairs.
***
funny you should choose to turn right,
there, he said. aren't you late for work?
a dry coating covered my parched tongue
as I answered
i need more coffee
and just
then
my right wheel plunged into a crevice wrecking my rim and putting my wheels out of alignment
oh my, he said, you just bought the world's first $1,688 cappuccino
***
royalty, you say?
crumbling
congested
puckered
and pocked by treacherous holes
a fitting image of this country's hypocritical past
i will not bow to you
– to the Queen Elizabeth Way
***
i thank the City of Toronto for asking me how my Volvo's suspension became shot and its exhaust pipe ripped
I don't know – City of Toronto – maybe a dinosaur did it?
It could not possibly be the fact I drove over the Grand Canyon on Eastern Avenue
If only
I had
witness accounts and contact numbers, date, time and location of the accident which caused the property damage or injury as well as an exact address including a diagram and/or photo of accident location along with a detailed description of how the accident happened and names, phone numbers of any witnesses
– your claim is denied
***
i did not know the depth of your shallowness
until
you turned my Schwinn Vantage RX1
into a unicycle
***
i do not want your openness
to catch me dreaming
i want to cover it
i wish to seal your deepest depths
and when, with sweet love that drips the honeyed glue that binds us
and
i have shovelled what's left
i want to see you disappear in a hardened sea of grey
- to the massive pothole on Unwin Avenue
***
that hiss you hear
is
my
soul
leaking
out of my rear left tire
***
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