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Stars and dogs

A humorous look at the companies that caught our eye, for better or worse, this week

General Mills (DOG)

How to revive sagging cereal sales: 1) Put prizes back in the boxes – an iPhone or a bar of gold, for example; 2) To win back boomers, put a message on the box that says "Now fortified with Viagra!" instead of "riboflavin and niacinamide"; 3) Go all-in with "Triple-Sugar Candy Floss and Gummi Bear Marshmallow Puffs." It's worth a try: Shares of General Mills went all soggy after quarterly sales slumped 4 per cent, hurt by weak demand for cereal and yogurt.

GIS (NYSE), $51.23 (U.S.), down $4.57 or 8.2% over week.


Bed Bath & Beyond (DOG)

You might say Bed Bath & Beyond investors are watching their money go down the drain. Citing Hurricane Harvey, restructuring charges and a new accounting standard, the home-furnishings retailer posted fiscal second-quarter earnings of 67 cents (U.S.) a share – well below the average analyst estimate of 93 cents and down from $1.11 a year earlier. With the stock tanking, investors just want to get into bed and pull the covers over their heads.

BBBY (Nasdaq), $22.51 (U.S.), down $6.16 or 21.5% over week.


Orbital ATK (STAR)

Talk about a missile launch. Shares of Orbital ATK soared into space after the maker of missile components, satellites and other military products agreed to be acquired by defence contractor Northrop Grumman for $7.8-billion in cash. With many countries including the United States beefing up their military budgets amid growing geopolitical instability, Orbital investors can use their cash to build a nice fallout shelter.

OA (NYSE), $132.64 (U.S.), up $22.60 or 20.5% over week.


Air Canada (STAR)

Wait. Aren't airlines supposed to destroy shareholder value? In a dramatic reversal of the usual trend, Air Canada's shares have gained about 1,800 per cent over the past five years. And after the company's investor day this week, analysts see more blue skies ahead: The airline said it expects to generate $2-billion (Canadian) to $3-billion of free cash flow between 2018 and 2020, even as it prepares to battle a new wave of discount carriers. Investors are flying high - for now.

AC (TSX), $27.51, up $3.22 or 13.2% over week.


L Brands (DOG)

It's obvious that Victoria's Secret models don't eat enough. Now, shareholders can't afford to eat, either. Already down by more than half over the past two years, shares of L Brands – parent of Victoria's Secret and Bath & Body Works – extended losses after Cowen downgraded the company to "market perform" from "outperform," citing competition from retailers such as Aerie and sports bras made by Nike and Under Armour. Someone buy these people a sandwich.

LB (NYSE), $39.65 (U.S.), down 89¢ or 2.2% over week.