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Celebrity Photos of the Week: Big Bird brains edition

All captions written by The Globe and Mail. You can follow Caption Writing Person on Twitter: @captionperson

1 of 19

Tiresome fame-grasping pop singer Lady Gaga launches a fragrance called Fame in London last week and finally jumps the shark.

Reuters

2 of 19

Keri Russell poses last week in Cannes during the annual MIPCOM television program market, also known as the Festival of Forgotten Celebrities.

Reuters

3 of 19

Also in attendance was Nigella Lawson.

AP

4 of 19

And Matthew Modine. Am I right?

Reuters

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5 of 19

Gillian Anderson was there too. Lady Gaga is due next year.

Reuters

6 of 19

That grating noise we hear in Canada is the sound of Ben Affleck selling his movie “Argo” as the story of the heroic rescue of American embassy workers during the Iran hostage crisis by the CIA and Hollywood, and the CIA and Hollywood alone.

AP

7 of 19

David Blaine’s latest magic trick involved standing in place for 72 hours in New York last week with electrical charges passing harmlessly through his body AND MAKING IT SEEM LIKE SOME SORT OF ACCOMPLISHMENT! Ta-da! The culture has never been richer.

Reuters

8 of 19

Kim Kardashian continues to enrich the culture at an event celebrating the 40th anniversary of Cosmopolitan magazine in Mexico City last week.

Reuters

9 of 19

Halle Berry attends Variety's 4th Annual Power of Women event in Beverly Hills last week. Not sure why she chose to pose like this at an event purporting to celebrate the power of women.

Reuters

10 of 19

Jennifer Garner attends Variety’s 4th Annual Power of Women Who Are Filthy Rich and Incredibly Beautiful and Get Free Dresses from Designers event in Beverly Hills last week.

Reuters

11 of 19

Jessica Biel wore a loose, patterned dress to Variety's 4th Annual Power of Women Narcissistic Festival of Fatuous Hollywood Self-Regard event in Beverly Hills last week.

Reuters

12 of 19

Stacy Keibler wore a short, white number to Variety’s 4th Annual Power of Women You’d Have Never Heard Of If They Weren’t Going Out With George Clooney event in Beverly Hills last week.

Reuters

13 of 19

Jennifer Love Hewitt arrives in style at Variety's 4th Annual Power of Yellow event in Beverly Hills last week.

Reuters

14 of 19

Speaking of Big Bird, the radical left-wing non-federal-taxpaying entitlement junkie, defends the continued feathering of his comfy safety nest outside a campaign event for Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney in New Hampshire on Monday. Romney has vowed to fire Big Bird if elected, and with good reason.

AP

15 of 19

Big Bird is seen here shamelessly cavorting with former Democrat First Lady Hillary Clinton in Communist China in 2002.

AFP

16 of 19

The politically active Liberal agitator is seen actually kissing former First Lady Hillary Clinton in New York City in 1993.

Reuters

17 of 19

Here we see one of Big Bird’s closest confederates snuggling up to the tireless Barack Obama supporter Oprah Winfrey. Need we say more?

Reuters

18 of 19

There really is no place in politics for do-gooding, left-leaning, sweet-faced, soft-voiced, fluffy-haired creatures raised in magical urban kingdoms who seem too impossibly good to be true.

AP

19 of 19

’Cept of course in Canada.

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