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Celebrity Photos of the Week: Charo finally explained

All captions by The Globe and Mail. Follow Caption Writing Person: @captionperson

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Ryan Gosling attends the premiere of "Gangster Squad" with your imaginary mother-in-law, a.k.a. his mom, in Hollywood on Monday. She imaginarily thinks you’re not good enough for him, by the way.


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Speaking of imaginary, and then adding the word “talent,” Russell Brand attends the premiere of “Gangster Squad” in Hollywood on Monday.


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Sean Penn’s agent, Satan, attends the premiere of "Gangster Squad" in Hollywood on Monday.


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Dominic Monaghan, attending the TV Critics Association press tour in Pasadena, Calif., last week, patiently sits and waits for reporters to return after some of them suddenly dashed out when they remembered that they’d left the doors open on their Volkswagen Beetles.


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Gary Busey, attending the TV Critics Association press tour in Pasadena, Calif., last week, patiently sits and waits for reporters to return after they ran screaming from the room.


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First person who says “Jabba the Hutt” gets a bounty put on their head by Angelica Huston at the TV Critics Association press tour in Pasadena, Calif., last week.


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Kids, this is Charo. She was the Nicki Minaj of the 1970s. The 1970s are a decade. A decade is 10 years. A year is two iPhones ago. Charo is from Spain. She went to the 24th Annual Palm Springs International Film Festival Gala last week. Nicki Minaj did not attend, but she will in 80 iPhones from now.


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Sixty-two per cent of Matthew McConaughey attended the New York Film Critics Circle awards in New York on Monday.


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French actor Gerard Depardieu hugs Russian President Vladimir Putin in Sochi last week after Putin granted him citizenship because he didn’t want to pay high income taxes in France. This is what happens when a rich person has to choose between high taxes and a tyrannical despot.


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Kim Kardashian flew into Calgary Friday night to host a party at a bar. By hosting, we mean she entered the bar, had her photo taken and then sat down on a couch and talked with her entourage while people who’d paid for the privilege stood there and stared at her. Way to go, Calgary. That’s so ... Toronto!


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Tom Cruise’s arrival at Haneda airport in Tokyo on Tuesday went well until the guy driving the bus in the background stuck his head in the door and said, “Anyone need a lift?”


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Director Quentin Tarantino explains where he gets his inspiration at the premiere of “Django Unchained” in Paris on Monday.


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Lindsay Lohan’s lawyer speaks to the media after filing paperwork on Lohan's behalf at Manhattan Criminal Court in New York on Monday. And really, who wouldn’t want a lawyer with a rabbit’s foot on his briefcase! No wonder she keeps winning.


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Rolling Stones' guitarist Ron Wood and his new wife, Sally Humphreys, arrive at the Topman Design Autumn/Winter 2013 collection in London, England, on Monday. He’s 65, she’s 34. To put that in perspective, the band he’s in is old enough to be her father, and he’s old enough to be the band’s father.


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Playboy founder Hugh Hefner poses with his bride Crystal Harris and dog Charlie at their New Year’s Eve wedding at the Playboy Mansion in Beverly Hills. He’s 86, she’s 26. There isn’t enough Cialis and booze in the world to put that in perspective.


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