Mummified actors - think George Hamilton - are not appealing. Chicks in bandages, though, have had a 25-year red carpet run.
We've seen everyone from Cindy Crawford and Angelina Jolie to most recently Miley Cyrus in the Herve Leger bandage dress. The first one, modelled by Crawford in 1985, is now officially vintage.
In one of those classic forhead-smacker moments, French designer Leger was on the factory floor when he saw bands of unused fabric. Of course, there is more to it: Leger has often been accused of ripping off Azzedine Alaia for the bondage/bandage idea.
Leger did well wrapping Hollywood hotties for years, then sold his name in 1999 to Max Azria (the BCBG guy).
This past fall, Azria revived the Herve Leger label on the runway with a fresh bunch of bandage dresses. A new generation of starlets lined up to walk the red carpet like Egyptians.
Notably, he got prices down to his BCBG label level - from about $1,000 a pop.
I have always wondered if I would feel like a sausage in a casing in one of these little numbers. So I went to try on a vintage Leger at the Paperbag Princess in Toronto's Yorkville.
It felt tight at first but the construction is brilliant.
Although it looks like it clings, there is actually well-boned lining, to put curves where one wants them and keep them from where one doesn't.
The new Herve Leger by Max Azria is at Holt Renfrew. They are also nicely made, but not for the ages, baby. As in fine for a party or two this year and fine for teensy young things. We won't be writing about them twentysomething years from now.
Then there is this little black bandage dress from Winners, which consists of many strips of stretchy fabric sewn together (you can find it in the junior trendsetters' racks).
At $29.99, it was never meant to be your little black investment dress. But it is perfect for this winter, when a body in bandages is just about the right image.
Funny thing is, selling one's name in fashion is creepy. I mean, if you are Chanel and you are dead, sure.
But because he did, poor Leger now designs under the name Herve Leroux. I mean, that is either a Looney Tunes or an SCTV character. Fashion is clichéd enough already.