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The sexy things Joseph Gordon-Levitt says people do to themselves while thinking about him

Actor Joseph Gordon-Levitt

Moe Doiron/The Globe and Mail

Joseph Gordon-Levitt knows that people are watching him … and, uh, doing things.

The former 3rd Rock from the Sun star showed up on The Colbert Report last night to promote Don Jon, his new romantic comedy opening in theatres today. To say he went off-topic would be an understatement.

The impish host Stephen Colbert asked Gordon-Levitt about his Don Jon character's inability to stop thinking about pornography, even while he's in bed with the lovely Scarlett Johansson.

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Staying in stentorian character, Colbert offered up the observation, "I don't masturbate to pornography. Pornography masturbates to me!"

To which Gordon-Levitt replied: "Yeah, totally, me neither. Well said, sir."

And then, while the two men were chuckling away, Gordon-Levitt abruptly dropped this bombshell: "People masturbate to me."

The studio audience oohed its approval, or possibly confirmation, of Gordon-Levitt's statement and Colbert, without missing a beat, said, "You should make this official, because this is true. Everybody knows it's true."

Added Colbert: "You should put that on a business card."

All frivolity aside, Gordon-Levitt has certainly moved on from his child-star days when he appeared in films like Beethoven and Angels in the Outfield. Now 32, he's been on a roll of late with high-profile parts in The Dark Knight Rises, Looper, Lincoln and other A-list features.

Above all, Gordon-Levitt is a savvy Hollywood player. Can a young, handsome actor admitting to being the sexual fantasy of moviegoers possibly be a bad thing for the box-office chances of a sexy new comedy?

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The man knows what he's doing.

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