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Tiger Woods

Despite his return to form – and return to contention at the British Open – Tiger just can't escape the headlines, even when he's just being honest. "Oh my God," Woods said when asked about the rough at Royal Lytham & St Annes, " … that bottom six inches, in some places it's almost unplayable." Not ones to let an adverb get in the way of a front-page story, both The Times of London and the Daily Mail dropped the word "almost" to trumpet Woods's damning verdict of the course as "Unplayable." Ah, Fleet Street, the epicentre of (self-serving) journalism.

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James Dolan

To err is human, but to screw things up royally, well, that's pretty much the exclusive domain of the Knicks' owner. In letting Jeremy Lin leave for Houston, Dolan has seen stocks for his Madison Square Garden Company plummet $93-million (U.S.), nearly four times the value of the contract Lin signed with the Rockets. Dolan is left to pick up the pieces with a fan base that saw ticket prices rise an average of 49 per cent last season, and which are set to rise further for the coming campaign. As one season-ticket holder told The New York Times: "How many times can they hurt me?"

Mark Dayton

It's no secret the American love affair with sports stars often defies common sense, but the Minnesota governor took those affections to new levels of stupidity this week in defence of Vikings tailback Adrian Peterson – a.k.a. the Purple Jesus – who was charged with resisting arrest this month. "It's, basically, slightly civilized war," Dayton said of the NFL. "Then they take that into society. Much as soldiers come back, they've been in combat or the edge of it and suddenly that adjustment back to civilian life is a real challenge." Yes, it must be tough to reintegrate yourself after dodging all those land mines on the way to the end zone.

Rockies fans

And Toronto sports fans thought they had it bad. Supporters of the Colorado Rockies, currently bottom of the National League West and on pace for a 100-loss season, are hardly smiling, and are even being prevented from showing their displeasure in time-honoured tradition. "As a security measure, post-9/11, any clothing which conceals a guest's face is prohibited, including but not limited to, costumes and masks," explained Jay Alves, the Rockies' vice-president of communications and public relations. "That would include bags over a guest's head."

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Michael Vick

After former backup quarterback Vince Young proclaimed last year's Eagles squad as the "Dream Team," you'd think this year's edition would be a little more wary after an 8-8 playoff-less campaign. But once bitten, twice shy apparently doesn't apply to Vick, who compared Philadelphia to the great Cowboys, 49ers and Packers teams of the 1990s. "I think we have a chance to be that," he said. "I think we have a chance to develop a dynasty." He might want to wait until the Eagles have at least won their first Super Bowl before making proclamations about future dominance.

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